7/2/15. The post where I tell you a crazy (and disgusting) story.

7/2/15: today was Thursday, but it felt like Friday because I have the day off tomorrow.  To celebrate the upcoming three day weekend, I went to lunch with some colleagues.  And we saw a crazy thing. (Those of you with weak stomachs may want to quit reading now.) 

We were eating at a local pizza joint and our table was right beside a full-length window, looking out onto the outdoor patio.  A man was sitting at a picnic table just a few feet from me, separated from me only by the window.  There was a pitcher of beer on his table and he was drinking beer from a glass while he talked on his cell phone.  My colleagues and I were eating our pizza and chatting, when suddenly I saw something out of the corner of my eye.  I looked out the window and saw him (brace yourselves) projectile vomit all over the pavement.  And that was not the crazy thing. The crazy thing was that after he finished, he immediately put the phone back to his ear and continued his conversation.  I'm not sure the person on the other end of the phone even knew what happened.

My colleagues and I sat at our table, stunned.  I got a takeout box for the rest of my pizza.  There would be no more eating for me after that.  (In fact, I could barely eat dinner tonight.)  We stayed at the restaurant for another twenty minutes, marveling over what we had just witnessed and when we left, he was still there.  In fact, he was chatting with the occupants of the table next to his, who arrived after his episode and appeared to be unaware of it.  I have to give him credit.  If I suddenly found myself staring down at the former contents of my stomach in a public place, it would be game over.  I would be curled up in a ball in the ladies room in a combination of agony and embarrassment, calling my patient, long-suffering husband to come pick me up. (At the very least, I would have immediately ended my call and started searching for a damp paper towel.)  But it didn't seem to phase this man at all.  I'm going to guess it isn't the first time this has happened to him.

I fully intended to write today in more detail about some of my experiences during my hiatus, but frankly, I can't get this out of my mind.  And now, neither can you.  Sorry.  Some of you who encouraged me to start writing again are probably regretting that right about now.  But look on the bright side.  At least I didn't post a photo.