2/28/17. The post where I kill two birds with one stone.

2/28/17: Saturday was my 5K benefiting colon cancer screening.  I started training several weeks ago and I knew I could do three miles with no ill effects.  At least in the balmy, non-winter weather we've had recently.  And then the night before the walk, a cold front blew in.  Crap.  As you know from my previous posts, cold weather and RSD are mortal enemies. For a brief moment, I considered blowing it off.  But the donations were piling in and the mission of the walk was very dear to my heart, so I set HAL to "stun" as a precautionary measure and got out my warmest workout clothes.

Saturday was a day of firsts.  The first race since I was diagnosed.  The first time since Mom's passing that I listened to the "fight" playlist I made for her while she was going through radiation. Yeah, that went about as well as you would imagine.  (In case you need a refresher on why I made the playlist.). One other weird first - the first time I went out in public without talking to a single person for several hours.  Most of you know me well enough to know that I am an off-the-chart extrovert who will strike up a conversation with anyone.  But Saturday was just for me.  When I walk for exercise, I don't listen to music or walk with a partner.  I use the time for reflection and solving the world's problems. Truth be told, I have probably composed more than half of the posts for this blog in my head while walking.  (When it comes to walking, I'm a loner, Dottie, a rebel.)  And given the mission of the walk, I wasn't exactly in the mood to socialize.  So I walked in silence. And it was just what I needed.

And the final first? The first time I voluntarily drank a beer. Well, half a beer. While I love wine and cocktails, I never developed an affinity for beer. I guess I didn't learn to drink it in junior high, or whenever it is you are supposed to learn to drink beer, but my New Year's resolution this year was to learn to at least tolerate beer.  Yes, I know, most people resolve to lose weight, exercise more, or better themselves in some way.  But, as you have figured out by now, I am not most people. And there are times my inability to choke down a beer hampers my professional and/or social life.  At least, that's how I've justified it.

As I crossed the finish line, the first thing I saw was the tent for the local brewery giving out free beer to participants.  My first reaction was "Come on - it is 9:30 in the morning!"  My second reaction was "Too bad it isn't wine."  My third reaction was "Oh, why not?"  So I got my beer prize, sat on the grass, and gave it a go.  And it wasn't bad. It wasn't great, but it wasn't bad.  Operation New Year's Resolution is officially in gear.

It took about 24 hours to warm up after the walk, and I had a slight  flare up afterward, but all in all, I would say it was a success.  Any day you can tell both colon cancer and RSD to suck it is a good day.   One of the few chances I'll have to kill two birds with one stone.  I have another 5K this Saturday, but this one will be very different - it is sponsored by a winery and is just for fun.  I think I've earned it.

2/12/17. The post where I tell you about an interesting coincidence.

2/12/17: Yesterday, I told you about my plan to start training for 5Ks.  This morning, I woke up and checked Facebook.  The first post I saw was about a 5K taking place in a couple of weeks less than five miles from my home benefiting....wait for it...colon cancer awareness.  Wow, very subtle, Mom. I think she is in favor of my plan.

2/11/17. The post where I become a member of a club I never asked to join.

2/11/17.  Yes, I am aware it’s been a long time since I posted.  Usually that means I am either feeling great and too busy to post or feeling too bad to post.  In this case, though, I just haven't been up to it.  But it's time, so here goes…and be prepared, because it will be a long one.

You may remember a post from approximately three years ago (March 28, 2014 for the detail-obsessed) where I posted about a frantic journey to get to the hospital to see my mom.  At the end of October 2016, I made a similar journey.  But this time, the story did not have a happy ending.  Those of you who have read since the beginning know that throughout my blogs, I have posted about Mom teaching me how to fight.  The last lesson she taught me was how to know when it it is time to quit fighting.

Within less than 48 hours of the initial call, I had become a member of the club that everyone joins eventually, but with few exceptions, no one ever asks to join. (I know in some cases people ask to join it.  Note to self: Google “Did Hitler have kids?”)  The last three and a half months have been both a whirlwind and an eternity.  As other members of the club have warned me, there have been good days and bad days. And terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days.  During this time, I have carefully avoided funerals. Until this week.

On Monday, I learned that someone who is a colleague and a good friend lost a parent unexpectedly.  Another member of the club.  And I knew it was time.  I went to the funeral, even though it meant a five hour drive each way.  And, you know what? I'm glad I did. It was meaningful to my friend and his family, and it gave me a little more closure. And it’s what Mom would have expected me to do. 

Am I still grieving? Sure. Am I still angry? Hell, yes. Am I still slightly lost? Absolutely.  Which means it's time to put on my big girl panties and reclaim my life.  I am my mother's daughter, after all, and as she taught me, it is nowhere near time to quit fighting.

Before my diagnosis, one of my favorite hobbies (besides cycling) was walking. (To those of you who tune in only for updates on my health status, you’re welcome.) 5K, 10K, hiking…anything to be outside and have some time alone away from my busy life. For the near future, no thanks to RSD, cycling is off the table as an option.  But as long as the battery holds out on HAL, I can walk like a boss. So I have worked up a plan to start doing charity walks again. 5K first, then 10K, then…who knows? I am hoping a half marathon is in my future. Probably followed by one of my trademark “perhaps I made a bad decision” posts.

I walked three miles this morning, with no apparent ill effect. (That is nearly a 5K, for those of you who are metrically challenged.) I wasn't happy with my finish time, but I can improve that with training.  Speaking of which, I have a training plan, and I bought a snazzy new pair of running shoes this afternoon.  So hang on, and keep your arms and legs inside the car at all times. I will keep you posted on my progress and my foot’s reaction. I still won't post every day, but I will try to be a little more regular about it. In the meantime, if you aren't yet a member of the club, be thankful and let your parents know you love them. If you are already a member, remember to keep fighting.